My Lists...

I'm a list maker,
I make a list for everything.
Partly because I'm forgetful and
partly so I have something to do.

I've been in the process of writing two separate lists for the past couple months.
but because my mind is ever changing I haven't been able to come up with a list that is satisfactory

then today,
staring at the draft of one of the lists, I realized.
it doesn't matter.
It' doesn't matter how many lists I make
or what the lists are for
none of it will happen

no matter how much I hope
or pray
or wait
or think positively about it
it's all for not

because I'm here and I'm stuck
and my lists mean nothing.
so I give up.
why make a list?
if I don't even care any more
if there's no hope left

I'll just be sitting over here
living a life of hopelessness